When Anneke was about six weeks old someone asked me, "what's your favorite thing about being a mommy?", and I somewhat guiltily did not know how to answer. Favorite? How did I sort out my favorite thing amidst such a transformative experience--notice I did not say "joyous" or even "wonderful." Sometimes the only thing that felt sure to me was the not dramatic but just matter-of-fact reality that yeah, I'd die for this little person. And that no matter how much I might enjoy little interludes away--dinner with the girls, or a pedicure, or even date night with my husband, I always reach a point where it's time to be home and with our baby NOW.
Not to misrepresent my experience of mother-love--really what I mean is that it's just too profound for me to really pick it apart or describe very well. Blogging about it does not do it justice, so I'll shut up about it.
Okay, but my current favorite thing? Rocking our baby to sleep. I've been reading up on sleep training and the need to leave the baby in the crib to fall asleep, and I don't know if I agree or disagree--sometimes that actually works. But there's nothing like having Anneke slumped like a little monkey on my chest, with her breathing slowing down and her little head on my heart, until she finallys succumbs to sleep. It just feels like the way to do things, at least right now--and we won't be able to do this for all that long.
4 comments:
My totally uneducated opinion is that different things work for different families. It sounds like you have read the literature and if you think that rocking her to sleep works better for your family, then do it. I have lots of friends that consistently nurse their children to sleep. One of the nice things about staying at home is that you don't have to worry so much about sleep or eating patterns because someone else isn't going to have to take the job over from you.
I used to love to hold peanut after she went to sleep. Especially when she got older and more mobile and I knew it wouldn't be long that I couldn't do it anymore.
Don't worry about her sleep and consider it a prescription to keep your blood pressure low. I can't think of anything more calming than holding a sleeping baby.
It is so true. The times I've left H at home with pops for a few hours of me-time, I always race home when I'm done because I can't wait to get back to him. And transformative is a really great word to describe the way the arrival of such a little package completely rearranges everything that was your life.
I say rock away. Methods of getting babies to sleep remind me of diets - no one way works for all people.
im a friend of steve korpi's from boston and i found your blog from sofia and heathers. i love this post...i have a five month old daughter and i wrote about this same thing on her blog. http://hazelana.blogspot.com/2008/07/prayer.html
rocking babies to sleep is the most natural and delicious thing i cant think of. "if it feels good, do it" may have got me in trouble quite a bit when i was 16, but as a mama it has served me well. enjoy!
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